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this took 3 loops of snooze by agust d to make. turns out that hearing "its gonna be okay" 87 times in your ear gets inspiration going. im so lonely. i wanna run away but everywhere i'll go, i will be there. im trying to gain weight but its so hard to eat. i was in recovery for 3.5 years of my life till i was 19 but never really gained weight or recovered. just stuffed my pants and bra with weights and coins and batteries. i love the internet void cause its like yelling into an abyss but i also hate it for the same reason. sometimes i look back at my old posts and think about how much i didnt change.